I see a lot of separation today. There are many lonely people. And I think, asking these people one by one, “Did you really want to be alone right now?” If you ask, I’m sure most of them would say “No”. The number of people who have found someone who is their equal and who grew up together is very small, and I think we need to look at these relationships with inspiration. Everyone wants to get close immediately.
I think the reason why relationships last so short or fail to last is that rapprochement happens too quickly. I think being together when attraction is felt, or opening one’s deepest wounds to each other, makes relationships very fragile.
slowly getting closer
We don’t know how to gradually get closer. We have forgotten its taste. We want everything to happen quickly. And we want it irresistibly. However, such a rapid rapprochement also makes communication difficult. Because you don’t know how to live yourself there. Suddenly you enter a very intense, fragile space. It becomes difficult to see what you want and express what you need when. And everything can fall apart with the broken communication that comes with it.
I think it is very effective here that the human baby is the baby that needs care the longest in the world. After growing up with so much attention for so many years, in the maturity period when that attention is taken away from you, what you see in front of you can create an incredible desire to get closer. It is very important to remain calm in the gravitational field of this polarization and to make room for friendship for a long time. I think this needs to be worked on. Seeing intermediate values, small details. Remembering the taste of getting closer slowly.
Maybe it’s more easily triggered in the male mindset: “What if she runs away!” Not acting with inner states such as, trusting life.. Making space for calmness and friendship.. I think this brings love. Maybe at this point, the question “Doesn’t he like me?” Not falling into internal states such as these and allowing yourself to feel the details of the developing friendship. Because a man who does this can create a situation for a woman that she is not accustomed to.
It may seem strange to many people, but if you ask me, I think the last thing that should be done between two people is sexual activity. I think so now. Because that moment is the moment when you are closest and most intertwined. There is a lot that can be done until we get there. And going there spontaneously is also very valuable. Loving each other so much that we now make love. And it’s also spontaneous.
I think that in such a close relationship, the potential for growth together is very high. What I am saying may seem simple and logical, like mathematics. But of course love knows no logic. Or it doesn’t happen with logic alone. Perhaps it is a situation where all intuitive insights and logic are intertwined. But still, I think knowing a little bit about these supports us in relationships. Friendship and passion to learn from everything that happens brings us closer.
In fact, what I have explained also has its equivalent in yoga movement practice. I think yoga needs to be shared in such a way that there are no more separations, no more sad, lonely, lonely people in a society that is already becoming increasingly individualistic.
You can look at the desiring nature of the mind as a masculine structure. As for your body, you can look at all bodies, male or female, and in fact all of life, as feminine. Because life itself, the process of creation itself, is already feminine. Then we can look at yoga practice as the relationship you establish with our body. Starting to know ourselves a little through yoga movement practice is the first step for our relationships. The second step, which is the deeper step of yoga, is experienced within the relationships we establish with people.
If the practice you are doing makes you feel more separate and alone, change the understanding within the practice. So that your practice is one that opens you up to relationships. Over the years, I have observed that while people are shown ways to establish contact with themselves, the techniques involved in this contact and the connection between these techniques and relationships are not explained much. So, this has become an area that I am very passionate about. Sharing something needed brings passion. I worked in the field of family constellation for six years.I received many trainings and worked as an assistant. That’s why I explain the understanding that comes to your life with yoga through relationships. Studying relationship dynamics has always excited me.
Let’s get back to our main topic. I was explaining what it means to gradually get closer in our relationships, and my explanations of this. Please continue reading what I will write in the rest of the article, despite the possible reactions that may arise in you:
In the process of a relationship until it reaches a level of closeness that can be called a relationship, I think everyone should be able to get closer and further away from the people they want and see how it feels. Because only in this way can he understand who he feels best with among the people he is getting close to. So he can make his choice in that direction. And thus, the probability that the choice he makes will be correct increases.
I think mindsets like, “You had a cup of tea and said, ‘Let’s see, who were you with yesterday?'” can be very restrictive. It can cause a relationship to end before it even starts or to start a painful one. Let the person you love and know feel free; Make friends with people. Use this situation as an opportunity to get to know him better, understand him, and thus get closer. Then he will love you more.
Trust and Love
And of course I’m talking about friendships. Otherwise, I think open relationships where everyone plays illegally and sleeps with others all the time are a terrible thing. A man needs to trust his woman. I think this is the man’s most important role in the relationship.
Not doing it to give confidence, or rather not doing it just to do it, but doing it by feeling is another thing. If you don’t feel love as a man anyway, you shouldn’t stay there at all. Deceiving a woman and lingering there is the wrong thing to do.
The more a woman trusts a man, the more he can love her. A woman’s trust and a man’s love are not separate from each other and develop simultaneously. I think experiencing this is the most enjoyable and beautiful thing in this world. Because when we feel this love, I think we love everything.